I'm gonna sing a song to you and I refuse to make it fake

College continues. I find myself on a perplexing new schedule where I want to sleep suddenly at three or four in the afternoon, and then I have to resist the urge to drink my tea at seven. I come early for my lectures and sit in the dark theater, tapping my fingers on a paperback copy of The Odyssey, my mind wandering from the subject of the morning's sermon at daily Mass to whether or not those sounds I heard could possibly be rats. I develop a weird affection for the speakers in the cafeteria, which are always playing some dippy song along the lines of Whoa, I swear to you, I'll be there for you, this is not a drive by-y-y-y-y. I seem to tremble beautifully on the brink of figuring out this Latin thing.

Clair, seeing that I'm busy, has enlisted Mary as her new cartoons-in-the-evenings buddy. As I work on my latest summary essay and hear them in the other room, laughing their heads off over The Regular Show, I wonder if there's room here for some pithy aside about Lost Innocence. (Hey, we're studying Genesis. Maybe I could work it in.)

Doesn't really matter, though, that I'm not an active cartoon-watcher anymore, since at literally any given moment, the question is not so much whether I have a song from Adventure Time stuck in my head as which one it is. I walk from this building to that hall and people don't know that I'm walking to the strings of an invisible ukulele, mentally singing a song that makes zero sense outside the context of the scene in question:

So Finn and Jake set out to find a new home,

It's gonna be tough for a kid and a dog on their own,

There's a little house, ah, Finn's sticking his foot in,

Well that's a bad idea, dude, 'cause now that bird thinks you're a jerk, Finn.

And now they're chillin' on the side of a hill and thinkin' livin' in a cloud'd be totally thrillin',

Unless they find something inside,

Like a mean cloud man and his beautiful cloud bride.

A beehive, oh no! Don't stick your foot in there, guy,

Y'all tried that before, and you know it didn't turn out right.

Perhaps I'll never really grow all that old.

(Aside: I'm way more opinionated about Adventure Time than I should be. In case you're familiar with the show, my issues specifically have to do with my loathing for toilet humor, combined with the fact that they totally jumped the shark introducing that "Flame Princess" character to be Finn's new love interest. If anyone wants to debate me, I'll take them.)